If you’re on a spiritual path, or want to be, then this blog will share candid (and sometimes outrageous) stories about my path to finding enlightenment.

I define enlightenment as the state of God-union, or connection to True Self, that is described as samadhi in Hindu/yogic culture and heaven in Christianity. This state is one of pure bliss—the highest level of consciousness we can possibly attain—and entering this state brings healing and conscious energy into your entire body.

Records of saints and rishis attaining samadhi can be found throughout the ages (Jesus and Krishna being among them). There are varying levels of samadhi, and once you reach the top level there are apparently even more “hidden” levels that bestow unique superhuman abilities, such as the ability to heal others, levitate, and change matter at will.

Those who are seeking higher levels of consciousness are encouraged to not pay attention to these abilities, since it’s often the ego which wants to attain power through superhuman skills. This ego-driven desire stops spiritual progress in its tracks.

I first was fascinated by the stories of these abilities after reading Autobiography of a Yogi. This book renewed my faith, which had suffered a beatdown over the years. I’ll be sharing more about this experience, but suffice to say—samadhi is the ultimate goal for me. Not because of the superpowers, but because I believe it’s all of our final destinations—the heaven that Jesus spoke of—and offers us a path to not only enlightenment, but immortality.

How hard could it be?

When I was a kid, I loved watching Top Gear. Before he jumped in a car to do something dangerous or stupid, the show’s host, Jeremy, would blurt out in his heavy English accent: How hard could it be?

Which, of course, meant that only minutes later he would be stuck in a ditch, using a power tool in a questionable manner, or generally getting in over his head.

But at the end of every episode, despite all the setbacks, the audience is always left thinking: well, he DID it, didn’t he?

I had the same approach when I began my personal growth journey. Clear old trauma and challenge myself to become more of my true self? How hard could it be?

Turns out, it can be a real bitch sometimes. Like, a real, sturdy bitch.

So when I sat down to start this Substack, thinking about sharing my story, and those words flew through my mind again, I paused to actually think about what this would entail.

Who the heck am I?

My name is Dan Russell. I’m currently 33 years old and I’ve been en entrepreneur for the past 10 years. I was raised Catholic and went to college like almost everyone else my age at the time, and while I was in college, I started distancing myself from God.

I was tired of the doctrine, the rules, the shame, and the power dynamics. I wanted to live my life on my terms and see what it was like without having all kinds of strings attached to my feelings and decisions.

(Today, I can say that I am glad my parents raised me to be Catholic. There were so many beautiful benefits of that religion, as is true for many religions. But, as I’ll dive into in a future post, there were also major drawbacks that only came to light years after leaving home and setting out on my own. Okay, back to the story.)

Once I was on campus and on my own, I got really into economics, math, and efficiency. I started thinking, well if everyone would just focus on being as efficient as possible, the world would be a happier place.

Thoughts of a 19-year old freshman.

I clearly hadn’t entered my prime—in fact, I was years away from it, and it wasn’t just my hair that gave it away. My belief in God had all but disappeared, and you could have fairly referred to me as an agnostic. Not an atheist, I hadn’t gotten to the point of denying God’s existence, but I stopped feeding my faith.

Years passed with little change, and after graduation I began my career with one thing in mind: be happy (at least I got that one right). I defined happiness at the time as pursuing things I thought were interesting that could make me money. If I could do that, I’d be happy.

I trepidatiously turned down a six-figure career in investment banking to work for $48,000 a year at a marketing tech startup in Englewood, New Jersey. Imagine a basement apartment with lots of mice at the height of the “hustle porn” culture. That’s where I learned my marketing skills, and not soon after, I started my own agency and went out on my own.

Nine years later, I was burnt out and realized that I wasn’t pursuing my purpose. Marketing had served an an intellectual muse for a time, but I was done with it. I’d learned enough, and my soul was telling me it was time to move on.

By this point, I had met my wife, Melanie Spring, and we had started working on a community that she’d started a few years prior known as The Brilliant Rebellion.

We hosted retreats and mentorship programs for people who were looking to enter the next chapter of their lives but didn’t know how. One of the requirements of being the leader of a group like that is that you have to REALLY have your shit together.

If someone is really dealing with a difficult situation, and you’re the person they trust to be able to lean on and fall apart with, you better not break. So Melanie and I invested a ton of time into developing ourselves, healing our own trauma, getting physically healthy, and strengthening our relationship so we could walk our clients (and in some cases, their spouses) through the fires of difficult challenges.

It was in this “training period” that I began to feel the presence of God. I was in my third ayahuasca journey when I first uttered the words “I believe in God” in my adult life—and meant them. But that’s a story for an upcoming post.

What’s important to understand is that I get the meandering nature of the path to God/Source/the Divine Creator that we can all experience over the course of our lives. Which brings me to the reason I’m writing this blog.

Why I decided to start writing

Kundalini & Ketamine is a delightful nod to the important intersection of ancient wisdom and modern knowledge. It hints at the way I think about approaching spiritual work: with the humility of knowing I don’t know everything and with the excitement of having tools of consciousness that humanity has never had access to before. It also points to the juxtaposition of two primary methods of achieving enlightenment: through physical embodiment (kundalini) and through deep meditation (ketamine). Although I'm not making the claim that ketamine is a recommended tool for everyone to meditate, it is a powerful dissociative psychedelic and aids many people in reaching deeper levels of meditation.

As I’ve done my “work” over the years, my slices of humble pie have grown larger. As the saying goes, “the more you learn, the less you know,” and that is no more true than in the realm of spiritual development.

I have, however, reached a point where certain truths about myself and the world around us have become so deeply rooted in my mind and my soul that I feel comfortable enough sharing them without feeling a need to convince you that my way is right, or any more right than yours. I’m happy explaining, or sharing my fascination around, these topics, but it’s never from a place of needing to convince someone of anything. We’re each on different paths and there are may paths to God.

This is the first time I’ll open up about psychedelics

I’ve been fascinated by the world of psychedelics and plant medicine for years. I’ve spent years immersing myself in sacred healing ceremonies and finding the right teachers so I could deepen my understanding of these sacred medicines (and yes, that includes synthetic psychedelics).

Unfortunately, the public is woefully misinformed around psychedelics. As it’s been said lately, fifty percent of what we call medicine are drugs and fifty percent of what we call drug are medicine. I’d like to play my part in reversing the taboo around psychedelics in our culture and preparing the way for readers like you to feel more comfortable with using them as a tool for growth, not just a recreational escape.

I look forward to posting here and building a community of people who are just as interested in this stuff as I am. Thank you for reading (and please subscribe, if you haven't already)!